This ‘great pause’ is causing all of us to experience so many different emotions on any given day or hour for that matter. I know in the beginning when this all went down I was not feeling as productive as I normally would. I was easily distracted and had a very hard time focusing. I found myself getting irritated at the constant barrage of videos, chain-mail messages, COVID news, and people from my past coming out of the woodwork trying to reconnect! Things that I thought I’d healed in myself were also coming up for me. I hadn’t had to deal with anxiety or depression after many years of inner work, yet I noticed each time I’d anticipate shopping or I see the line outside the grocery store, my stomach would lurch. What I quickly realized was that I had to double-down on all of my best mental/emotional/spiritual/physical health practices. I also had to re-establish boundaries on what media or messages I wanted to let in to my world for my own sanity.
This whole pause has amplified old issues that we may have thought we’d said good-bye to long ago. Past traumas are re-emerging. It’s also true that being an empath and highly sensitive I can also readily feel the anxious energy of others.
Not to mention when I pile on all that I keep hearing online as a small biz owner about how adversity creates opportunity, that we all must pivot, create new ways of working – that clients need leaders more than ever – that can stress me too – like I am going to miss my chance at a business breakthrough or something! But then, I’ll pause and remind myself that wherever I am in this very moment is exactly where I’m supposed to be.
I acknowledge there is no right or wrong way to do this. As long as I am kind, compassionate, loving, and give myself permission to be where I find myself – all is well.
We are heading into our 6th week of lockdown and I think I can sort of say I’ve settled in? Each day upon waking I’m feeling more okay with the – albeit groundhog day-like – routine. I’m still not sure if I’m as productive as I’d like to be but life is different now. If it takes 3 hours to shop including delivering my mother-in-isolation her groceries, that’s got to count for something.
